Question:
B”H Thank you for your help. My question is: I invited a relative to join for the Rosh Hashanah holiday. I was not sure if they were coming, so I asked them, and they said they are planning to come, but only for one night. This means that they will be driving at some point over Rosh Hashanah. I do not want to disinvite them, but I am not sure how to handle the situation. I tried to get them to stay for both days/nights, but they are indicating that is not their plan. 1. Am I required to disinvite/ discourage them from joining? I am trying to encourage this relative to B”H become more observant, and I feel that disinviting them could have the opposite effect 2. Would I get a sin by allowing them to stay for one day instead of two? I invited them for the entire two days and I can’t control that they intend to stay for one…Your guidance is sincerely appreciated. Shana Tova.
Answer:
Your question is a very sensitive one, and there is controversy about it. In your specific situation, since you made it clear to them that you indeed would love for them to stay for the whole Yom Tov, and that you have the accommodations for them to do so, and you would love for them to stay longer. The fact that the relative choose on his own will to leave in the middle of Yom Tov is their issue and you are not accountable for it. This is in conjunction with the fact that this is not a one-time occurrence, but you are trying to be mekarev, them and uninviting them will cause damage to the effort. I am posting this answer privately, because this is not the ruling in all instances, but specifically for this case, and in order that others should not confuse things, it will be posted privately.
Shana Tova
Sources:
R’ Y. Berkowitz, R’ Avi Elbaz Shlit”a
